And I Hope You Enjoy Your Flight
by Nekouyoku
Summary: Allen works as a flight attendant on a plane, and who happens to be on this plane other than Tyki Mikk himself. TykixAllen. "T" for language.
1. Not in the Slightest

Disclaimers: Cursing, threats to national security, boy love...

You know.

I don't own -Man. Or anything else in this fanfiction. Except the plot.

Enjoy~

((Or else.))

* * *

A bleeding goddamned flight attendant. Could Allen's life get any worse?

Well, he supposed he shouldn't ask that. After all, at least they weren't making him wear a pencil skirt. And at least he was getting paid.

In all actuality, he had to admit he didn't look half bad. He had his hair up in a short ponytail, and the hat sort of reminded him of the British police force.

He grinned in the mirror, straightening his hat and flattening out a wrinkle in his pants. Young for the job? Maybe. But damn, did he look the part.

* * *

He sat there patiently in the back of the plane with his legs crossed and his hands folded in his lap for the pilot to finish his long, drawn out speech about how to ride an airplane. Thankfully, Allen wasn't one of the people who had to demonstrate how to use a seatbelt and all that jazz. He doubted people would be able to see him past the heads in front of them, anyways.

Jeez. You know it's bad when you start making short cracks about _yourself_. He sighed quietly, but was cut short when the plane lurched forwards.

What, they were moving? When did this happen? Allen scolded himself for not paying attention, and buckled his seat-belt. Up up and away, off to Neverland!

Oh, they _were_ going to Florida, weren't they…?

* * *

"Attention passengers, we have now reached cruising altitude and I'm turning off the seatbelt sign, feel free to move about the cabin. However, I would ask that you keep your seatbelt buckled if you choose to remain seated. Thank you."

Allen unbuckled and jumped out of his seat, stretching. Now all he had to do was wait for—

"The flight attendants will now be coming by with carts of refreshments."

Oh, that was fast. Allen walked over and placed himself behind a cart. He pushed slightly.

"Holy…" those things were heavier than they looked. Then again, Allen was stronger than he looked. With a bit of a start, he easily pushed the trolley down one of the aisles.

"Drinks, anyone?" he chimed, with a blinding smile. People pleaser, that's him.

A water there, a soda here…No one else for now? Alright.

He continued walking, but stopped for a moment when he accidentally brushed against someone's elbow. The said "someone" gave a diminuending whistle, which had basically the same effect as a wolf call.

"Oh, pardon me, sir," Allen said, ignoring the whistle. Some people were pricks, really, and you just had to ignore them.

"No, no trouble," came the reply. Wait, wait, didn't Allen know that voice?

He looked down.

"God have mercy," he cried quietly.

"Er, I mean, hello, Tyki."

* * *

Allen finished his refreshment run and took refuge in the back of the plane. Passengers weren't allowed back there. He was safe, for now.

Of course, anyone else who swung around thought he was crazy, due to how panicked he looked when there was obviously nothing wrong.

Breathe, Allen, breathe. He's just a passenger, just like everyone else. He just happens to be on the same plane that you just now started to work on. Yeah. Just happens.

For some reason, Allen highly doubted that.

"Hey, Allen," one of the more seasoned flight attendants called.

"Hm? Yeah?"

"Someone's pressed the 'assist' button at their seat. Why don't you go help them, okay?"

"Oh, yeah, okay…what seat?"

"21B."

"Kay."

* * *

"Tyki, you do realize we have procedures for people who press that button for no reason."

"But…I need help."

"Yes, I am aware."

"Oh, that's just mean."

"You deserve it and more."

"Yes, I do deserve more."

"Well, I don't think I'm allowed to verbally abuse the passengers."

"I'd take abuse from you any day."

"…okay, anyways, _why_ did you press the button?"

"Oh, yeah. Well, I think my seatbelt's stuck."

Tyki couldn't resist a grin.

"…Bloody hell, Tyki, _you are a pervert_."

"Awwww, come on. I'm serious…"

Allen clenched his teeth in a grimace. Why was it the _creepy_ guys? Why could he never have a _normal_ person pine after him?

"Don't you dare touch me," Allen stated, and then leaned over to unbuckle the creep's seatbelt.

Tyki complacently kept his hands still. Of course, one of his hands was being kept still on the armrest that Allen was leaning over.

"Oh, _blinding_, it really is stuck, isn't it," Allen groaned, standing back up. Of course, he didn't doubt for a second that Tyki had done it on purpose.

"Uhm, yeah. But wait, I think you almost got it. Try again."

"Tyki, bloody hell, you really do need help."

"Yeah, but my last therapist got sent to the loony bin before he could send me."

"Well, that's a shame."

"In'nit, though?"

Allen looked up as someone tapped him on the shoulder.

"Oh, sorry," he said, and then slipped past Tyki into the empty seat next to him.

"Well, what's this?" Tyki asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Shut up, I'm just getting out of the aisle until we get your stupid seatbelt unstuck."

"Hm, I see."

"Yeah, don't get your hopes up, pervert."

"Of course not."

If Allen could have seen Tyki's face when he started working with the seatbelt again, a certain someone would have probably gotten slapped.

"Hey Allen, while you're down there, you might as well give me a bl—owwwwww."

Or an elbow in the stomach. That works, too.

"Tyki, why is there a paperclip in here."

"Haven't the foggiest."

"I highly doubt that."

So did Tyki.

"Hey, you have any tweezers?"

"Oh, yeah, hold on."

Tyki pulled out a Swiss Army Knife.

"BLOODY HELL. Tyki, _why_ do you have that _on an airplane_, for god's sakes?"

"Oh. Uhm…I don't know. You want tweezers or not?"

Allen was starting to fear for his safety. "Yeah, hand them over."

* * *

In around a minute, Tyki's seatbelt finally released him.

"Wow, you're good with your hands, aren't you?" the older of the two exclaimed.

"You, for one, are never going to find out _how_ good, that's for sure," Allen grumbled, pocketing the paperclip and handing Tyki's threat to national security back.

"If you say so…"

"I do say so. And if you wouldn't mind moving your legs a bit, I'm leav—"

Allen was interrupted by a "ding" as the seatbelt sign turned on.

"Attention, passengers, we will be experiencing some slight turbulence, so if you could find your seats immediately, that would be dandy."

Tyki pushed Allen back into the empty seat.

"Looks like you're staying here for now," he purred, buckling his seatbelt again. Allen groaned, and reluctantly strapped himself in. He really needed to go to church more. God obviously hated him for _something_.

Allen pointedly stared out the window. The clouds looked kind of dark…creepy.

"Hey, Allen," Tyki said. Allen turned around, against his better judgment.

Once he did, he was met with a kiss.

"Thanks for getting my seatbelt," Tyki said. With a wink.

"Y-yeah," Allen stammered, his face turning red. He hurriedly turned to look out the window again.

"Aww, how cute," Tyki said, smiling. Allen folded his arms and squared his shoulders, leaning into his seat. He did _not_ like being "aww"'d at. And he couldn't help but notice that Tyki could probably see his ears turning bright red.

"Allen," Tyki said again. This time he didn't turn around.

"_What_."

"You've got something on your pants."

"Big deal."

"No, seriously."

"I don't care."

"But…"

"Sod off, Tyki."

But for some reason, this translated to Tyki as "well, get it off, then" and he took the liberty of leaning over and getting it _off_ his pants. Of course, "it" just _happened_ to be on the in-side of one of Allen's thighs.

"Bloody hell, Tyki, do you want me to get you arrested? I'm pretty sure I could at this point!"

"I was just getting a piece of lint off for you."

"I could have gotten it off myself."

"But you _weren't_."

"Augh," Allen groaned in frustration. He glared up at the seatbelt sign, _willing_ it to turn off. Off. _Off_ I say.

Surprisingly enough, it did.

"Oh thank god," Allen breathed, reaching to unbuckle his seatbelt.

Er, uhm, unbuckle…his seatbelt…

For some odd reason, it wouldn't come off.

"_Tyki_. _What_ did you _do_."

"Oh, whatever do you mean?"

"I'm going to bleeding kill you."

"It's not my fault the seatbelts are faulty."

"Huh. Right," Allen grumbled. He stared at his seatbelt. Then he decided that he would rather get out of there _right now_, fixed belt or not. He tried to pull the seatbelt out so he could slip out from under it.

It wouldn't budge.

"Tyki, in any other situation I would be amazed at whatever you did to these. But seriously. You. Need. Help."

"Looks more like _you_ need help with that seatbelt," Tyki said. Allen frowned, turning pink again.

"You bloody well make it quick, Mikk," he grumbled, folding his arms. Tyki did a mock-salute, and pulled out his army knife.

* * *

That was possibly the reddest Allen's face had ever been. He wondered if it wasn't steaming.

And he couldn't shake the feeling that he was being very subtly felt up, whether Tyki actually meant it or not. Although…he probably did.

"You're taking an awfully long time down there," Allen pointed out.

"Just enjoying the view…"

"I bet the view's great when you're falling out of an airplane," Allen huffed, shifting himself a little bit.

"Hm," was all Tyki said. Although the seatbelt clicked off a second or two later. "There you go," he said, finally sitting up again.

His eyebrows rose when he saw Allen's face.

"Wow, your face is _really_ red," he said.

"_Really,"_ Allen groaned, his voice positively _dripping_ with sarcasm. He tilted his hat towards Tyki, hoping it would help hide his face.

"So, not to sound rude or anything, but you're not going to leave now…?" Tyki asked, looking confused.

"Just leave me alone for a second, you have no idea how hard my heart is beating right now," Allen mumbled.

"Alrighty then," Tyki said, sounding the slightest bit worried. He pulled out a cigarette to chew on.

* * *

"Allen, is that you?"

Allen looked up at the other flight attendant standing in the aisle.

"Oh, hey, Ms. Nine," he greeted.

"Jeez, Allen, my god, your face is red. Are you feeling okay?"

"'Tis not so red now as it was before," Tyki added to the conversation. Cloud looked down.

"Oh, and who's this?" she asked.

"An acquaintance of mine," Allen grumbled.

"Tyki Mikk's the name," he said, holding out his hand. Cloud shook it, smiling politely.

"Jeez, Allen's looking at you like you stole something from him," she laughed.

"Only my dignity," Allen said, sighing. Cloud laughed.

"Well, if you don't mind, Mr. Mikk, I think I'm going to have to take Allen away from you. Feel free to visit him in the back of the plane, though."

Tyki nodded. "Thanks," he said, sparing a glance at Allen as he squeezed by.

"Don't bother," Allen mouthed as he walked away. Tyki grinned.

* * *

"You two seemed like very interesting 'acquaintances'," Cloud said, raising her eyebrow. Allen flopped down on a seat.

"He's a friend of a friend. I barely know him," Allen said, folding his arms. Cloud thought it looked rather like he was pouting.

"It didn't seem that way to me," she said, smiling. "Come on, I'm a woman, I have experience in these sort of situations."

"'These sort'? What sort would _that_ be?" Allen squeaked.

"Oh, I think you know," Cloud purred. Then she took a couple steps towards the exit. "I'm going to go discuss a few things with the captain, kay?"

Then she left.

Allen had a very foreboding feeling about it all.

* * *

Allen's foreboding feeling was justified when Tyki swung around for a visit.

"Hey buddy," he said, smiling and sitting down, _right_ next to Allen.

"There are no friends of yours here," Allen grumbled, leaning on the wall.

"Oh, so are we more than friends, then?"

"No. We're 'acquaintances'."

"An 'acquaintance' can be many, many things, Allen m' dear," Tyki said, leaning closer.

"Including stalker and stalkee," Allen said, frowning and pushing Tyki away.

Tyki leaned in again and kissed the reluctant boy. Again.

"You're not supposed to look love struck when your stalker kisses you, Allen."

"Sh-shut up. It's hormones and stuff. I'm 15 for god's sakes, I can't help it!"

"I'm 26, and I can't help it, either."

Another kiss.

"You're an arsehole."

"But you know you like it."

"I never said I didn't."

Allen pulled Tyki down to his height, and they had a little fun.

* * *

Of course, it was the type of fun that could be easily cut-off if needed.

"W-wait, Tyki," Allen said.

"Huh? Why?"

"Listen."

The sound of high-heels heading towards the back of the plane.

"Tyki get off," Allen hissed, pushing the older man slightly.

"Yeah I know I know."

Allen put his hat back on and buttoned his jacket back up, just in time.

Cloud Nine walked in.

"Hey you two," she said.

"Hey," they both said.

Cloud raised an eyebrow.

"You seem awfully flustered, Allen," she said.

"Do I?" Allen asked. Tyki looked over at him.

"Don't seem flustered to me," he said.

"Ah. Well, I don't know why I would be flustered," Allen said, shrugging.

"No, me neither," Tyki added.

"Not in the slightest."

"At all."

"For no reason."

"Any."

Cloud stared at them.

"Right. You guys are weird."

* * *

Yeeeah. My friends and I had this joke about Allen being a flight attendant and Tyki always sneaking onto the plane. So. This was born.

And, "diminuending" is so totally a word. Shhhh.

R&R please. C:


	2. What was that for?

Omg another chapter? Yeah! O:

For disclaimers, see previous. xD

* * *

Allen's first thought was that the bed he was in was really comfortable.

His second thought was that he couldn't move his arms.

He sat straight up in the bed he was in, only to see that he was in a hotel room. And his wrists and ankles were bound.

And Tyki was having a smoke at a desk in the corner of the room.

"TYKI BLOODY FUCK WHY IN THE HELL AM I TIED UP AND WHERE THE BLOODY FUCK AM I."

Tyki looked up.

"Oh, good morning."

"Tyki. You better as hell tell me what's going on or so help me I will get out of these bloody ropes and call the police on you."

"What's there to tell?"

"First, why am I not on a plane home right now."

"What, you don't remember?"

"_Evidently __**not**_."

"Well, that lovely attendant…who was it, Cloud?"

"Bloody hell, Tyki, get on with the fucking story."

"Sorry. Well, Cloud decided that she would let you have a little break for the rest of the plane ride since we were such good buddies and all…you _do_ remember what happened _before_ that, right?"

Allen's face turned red, despite the situation.

"Yes I remember what happened before that continue with your _damned story_."

"Ah. So, you sat in the empty seat next to me for a while, and Cloud went by with the drink trolley and how could I _not_ buy something from a woman like that."

"Huh."

Allen was _so_ not jealous. Not in the slightest. At all.

"Yeah. So, I bought you something, too. And a couple minutes after you drank some of it, you started to feel a little bit sleepy so you told me to wake you up when we landed and everything."

"Tyki you bloody sexual pervert you put something in my drink, didn't you."

"Only a little."

"I'm calling the police."

"Good luck with that."

Allen scowled.

"Un-bloody-tie me already," he yelled, slamming his bound feet down on the bed.

"Shhh, love, the people in the other room will hear you."

"Huh. You know what, that's a good idea. I'll just scream until someone in the other rooms comes and rescues me."

Allen took a deeeeep breath…

"No no no okay I'll untie you," Tyki said, getting up rather quickly. Allen shut his mouth.

"How did you get me through the airport, anyways?" he asked as Tyki walked over.

"I told them you were a narcoleptic."

"Huh."

Allen twirled his ankles around after they were untied.

"So, any particular reason you kidnapped me?"

"Eh, not really. I just have nothing else to do…and you're not a particularly bad kisser, either."

"So you drugged me, kidnapped me from the plane I was working on, dragged me through the airport, and tied me up in a hotel room _because you were bored?_"

"Yeah. Pretty much."

Allen rubbed his wrists. Then he punched Tyki in the face.

"Owwww. What was that for?"

"Did you _honesty_ just _ask_ that?"

Tyki rubbed his nose. Then he looked up at Allen.

"Okay, okay, so I deserved that, yeah."

"You deserve a lot more than _that_, Mikk. It's just that I don't have any sharp objects right now."

"Oh, dear. No need to get violent."

"Oh, there is every need to get violent."

Tyki blinked. Then he took a couple drags on his cigarette while Allen attempted to calm himself down.

"So, any chance I'm going home anytime soon?"

"I have a flight booked for Wednesday."

"…what day is today."

"Sunday."

"Stuff it, I'm calling my uncle," Allen said, reaching for the phone. Tyki didn't bother stopping him.

"I really don't think Cross is going to spend any money to buy you a flight back when there's someone readily willing to bring you back for free…"

Allen froze with the phone in his hand.

"Bloody hell, my uncle is an arse," he said, slamming said phone back onto its stand. Tyki smirked.

"So, looks like we have around two days and a half of alone time, considering it's almost night and all."

Allen glanced out the gap in the curtains on the hotel window to see only the light of a streetlamp illuminating them. Tyki put out his cigarette and flicked it into a trash can.

"So, what're we going to do?" Allen asked, continuing to stare at the window.

"Well, I can't think much into the future, currently, but as for now…"

Allen barely had time to look over before Tyki, in one swift motion, managed to pin the Brit to the bed, one hand on either side.

"Ah, er, uhm…" Allen stuttered, trying to pull his wrists away from the older man's older grip. It wasn't working.

"Hm?" Tyki inquired, a smirk playing across his face as he leaned in ever-so-slightly.

"I…I really d-don't want to do this," Allen stammered, his face turning red.

"Huh. It's not like I'm going to _rape_ you or anything."

"Well, no, but…well, actually…"

"'Actually' what?"

"Well, theoretically, I mean, this is a big 'what if', but, let's say that even if it _was_ 'consensual', you could still be charged if I chose to tell someone."

"Heh? 15 is legal, isn't it?"

"No, sir. And besides, we're in Florida."

"Yeah, so?"

Allen cleared his throat.

"A person 24 years of age or older who engages in sexual activity with a person 15 or less years of age commits a felony of the first degree, punishable by—"

"Okay, okay, I get it," Tyki sighed. "Fine, we just won't go that far, then."

"Wha—actually, that was kind of your cue to get the _bloody hell_ off me!"

Tyki rolled his eyes.

"You want to hear my favorite Bible verse?" he said.

Allen blinked.

"I really don't see how your conscience can stand talking about the Bible when you're about to statutorily rape a 15-year-old boy, but sure, have at it."

"Alright. It's: 'As for you, be fruitful and increase in number; multiply on the earth and increase upon it.' Genesis 9:7. Isn't it lovely?"

"Huh. You ain't multiplying nothing, mist-ah."

"Yeah, but it makes for good practice."

"Oh, practice, am I?"

"If you want to be."

Allen scowled.

"No, I _want_ to be let _go_ and sent _home_ before I _divide_ you and your _multiplier_ with my _foot_."

Tyki sighed. Then he leaned down, and kissed the reluctant 15-year-old.

The already familiar feeling of Tyki's lips against his melted Allen's protests like hot butter. Oh-ho, was that his _tongue_…? The younger couldn't help a satisfied moan in the back of his throat.

"Was that a _moan_?" Tyki purred, raising an eyebrow.

"N-n…well, yeah."

"I _see_…"

Tyki freed Allen's hands, which immediately stretched up to Tyki's neck, pulling him down while their lips were locked together.

Tyki slowly realized how much he absolutely _despised_ state laws.

The older of the two slowly started unbuttoning Allen's jacket. He expected some sort of protest, but evidently Allen was too captivated for any sort of multiple-awareness.

But, suddenly, Allen broke off.

"Do you hear something?" he said, looking over at the door.

"No," Tyki answered immediately, and was about to dive in for another round when he was rudely interrupted by a knock on the hotel room door.

"Housekeeping," said a male voice that was certainly _not_ Latin-American.

"Er, could you come back later?" Tyki called.

"Yeah, whatever," the voice said, and then walked off.

Tyki looked back down at Allen.

"What's that look for?"

"You know, I really don't think we should be doing this," Allen mumbled, pulling his hands off of Tyki's neck.

"What? Why?"

"…Just. No…"

"You didn't seem to have any problem with it a moment ago…"

"Well, the moment's been ruined."

"Oh come _on,_" Tyki groaned, "we were actually _getting_ somewhere, too!"

"That's the scary part."

Tyki sighed, and lifted himself up to his knees. Then he sat down on Allen's legs.

"And you _still_ won't get off of me?" Allen groaned, propping himself up on his elbows. He honestly couldn't believe this was happening to him.

"And why should I do that?"

"To buy me some food," Allen mumbled, shifting one of his legs slightly.

Tyki laughed. "Sure, I can do that," he said, and leaped off the bed.

"Are you sure?" Allen asked.

Tyki blinked.

"Uhm, yeah."

"You're absolutely _positive_."

"Why…would I _not_ be?"

Allen smiled in a way that made even _Tyki_ shiver.

"Oh, no reason."

* * *

You had to feel at least a little bit sorry for the taxi driver.

"You know, I could have _sworn_ age 15 was legal…"

"I don't know what time period _you're_ living in, gramps."

"Hey, I'm not _that_ old."

"You're almost _twice_ as old as I am."

"I am _not_ thirty, thank you very much."

"Might as well be, for the slack you're going to get from the law."

"I didn't even _do_ anything."

"You nearly did."

"Oh, please, I didn't even get your shirt off for god's sakes."

"You would have if it wasn't for that man-maid."

"Please don't make that more disappointing than it already was…"

"Oh, so you admit, you _wanted_ to screw me!"

"Uhm, duh."

"God, you're such a pedophile."

"…oh, god, please tell me you're just kidding."

"Huh. Don't I _sound_ like I've hit puberty?"

"N-n…wait, ye…What am I _supposed_ to say?"

"Maybe you'll find out later."

"Sounds promising."

The taxi came to a stop.

"Okay, we're here, please just get out of the car."

"Huh? Don't you want your pay?"

"We didn't go that far it's not that much just please _leave now_."

"Oh. Okay."

* * *

"My god it's humid out here," Allen said as they walked down the sidewalk.

"Uh, yeah. It's Florida."

"Huh. So, where're we eating?"

"I don't know. Pick somewhere."

Allen looked around.

"Uhm…there," he said, pointing. Tyki looked over.

"A…fast food restaurant?"

"Uhm, yeah. I'm really hungry. Right now. I don't want to wait."

"…you sure?"

"Trust me, you'll thank me later."

* * *

"Ah, now, let's see," Allen said, pulling out a wallet that looked…strangely like…

"Wait, hey," Tyki said, patting down his pockets, "since when…did you have my wallet!?"

"You said yourself I was good with my hands…"

"Well, can I have it _back_ now?"

"Hold on, hold on," Allen said, fingering through the various slots. "Ah, who's this, your last girlfriend?" he asked, pulling out a picture.

"That's my _niece_…"

"Huh. Sorry, it seemed possible. Oh, now what's this…? Well, I know you're 26 already…oh, you're _Portuguese?_ Raunchy…"

"Please…just give my wallet back…"

Allen stared into the flap that held the money, looking rather disappointed. Then he handed the wallet back to Tyki.

"What was _that_ look for? I've got nearly $50 in here…"

"Yeah, but…oh, never mind. We'll see how long it lasts."

"How long it…lasts?"

Tyki was starting to get worried for his money. But, a kid _that_ small couldn't eat _that_ much…

…could he?

* * *

"Hm. Well, I guess I'll start with a number one. Large, please and thank you."

"Right-o, then. Anything else for you, sir?"

Allen glanced over at Tyki, who shook his head.

"Not for now. I'll be back, though."

* * *

Allen sat down with his tray, and Tyki sat across from him.

"I still don't see why you were eyeing my wallet like that."

"Oh, you will," Allen said, grinning. Then he folded his hands and closed his eyes. "Thank you for the food and the beautiful man paying for it, amen."

Then Tyki watched as Allen somehow managed to get half the sandwich in one bite.

"So you're good with your _mouth_, too…"

Allen, being the gentleman that he is, didn't want to speak while his mouth was full, so he promptly flipped Tyki off, instead.

So, Tyki was quiet the rest of the minute or two it took Allen to finish his entire meal.

"Alright, second course time," Allen chimed, wiping the sides of his mouth with his napkin. Then he pranced up to the counter again.

He ordered something else and paid…wait, paid? Tyki slipped his hand into the pocket he _knew_ he had put his wallet in.

"_Damnit_." _How_ did he keep _doing_ that?

* * *

Tyki got more and more grateful that Allen had picked a fast-food restaurant instead of a more expensive one.

I mean, after he came back with his…wait, how many meals had he had? Well, he was way past numbers, and he'd already gone through the value menu twice…

Tyki stared at the immense pile of trash that was piling up on the side of the table.

"Are you…almost full?" he asked as Allen sat down again.

"Hmmm…"

Tyki looked hopeful.

"No, but your wallet's almost empty, so I think I'll be fine."

"Ah, I see." Well, at least he wasn't going to have to use his credit card at a _fast food_ restaurant…

* * *

So, after Allen had filled up a trashcan and a half, he handed back Tyki's wallet, which was significantly heavier now that it was filled with small change.

"You could have at least _warned_ me. We're going to have to end up paying for the taxi fare in change…"

"Oh. Huh. I guess you're right."

Tyki groaned. "You are going to eat me out of house and home before we even get _back_ there."

"Well, maybe you should send me back, then? You won't have to feed me."

A smirk immediately returned to Tyki's face.

"Oh, no, I think I'll be fine."

* * *

Tyki stared at the fine. Then he stared at his wallet full of so many pennies. He had counted them earlier; it wasn't enough.

Oh, well.

He dumped all of the money he had onto the passenger's seat. "Keep the change," he said, and got out of the car as quickly as he could.

They were back in the hotel room before the taxi driver could figure out he'd been gypped.

"Okay, so," Tyki said, "we still have two and a half days left, since the plane on Wednesday leaves around two or three.

"Uhmhm."

"And it costs me around…let's say $60, every meal, since I didn't _eat_."

"Uhmhm."

"Two and a half days would be around eight meals…"

"Uhmhmmm."

"Which means by the end of this I'm going to be short almost $500, not counting taxi fares or this hotel room or airplane tickets…"

"Not my problem."

Tyki sighed.

"I guess it's my own fault, though…"

"That's one feeling that's mutual, then."

"_Thanks_."

"No problem. But, now I've been fed, and I'm going to sleep, 'kay?"

"Alright."

Allen stared at his outfit.

"That looks really uncomfortable to sleep in," Tyki said.

"Well, I really don't see what I can do about that."

"You could take it off."

Allen glared at him.

"You know what; I think I'm going to sleep on the couch."

"You sure about that? There's an awful draft from that window."

"I can handle it, trust me," Allen grumbled, and walked over to lay on aforementioned couch.

"Alright, if you insist…"

Allen turned his back to Tyki. He heard a shuffle of fabrics, and then was hit in the head with Tyki's pants.

"Thanks for that," he said, not turning around.

"Anytime."

He heard Tyki getting bed.

_Wow, there _is _a draft_, he thought.

Well, they were in Florida. It wasn't like it was a particularly _cold_ draft.

It was a bit annoying, though…

* * *

All of my Tyki x Allen stories spawn second chapters...? xD Oh, well, this was way too much fun to write, anyways.


	3. Buffets and Smoothies

Lame chapter is laaame.

But, hey, you guys asked for it.

Enjoy (as much as you can)~

* * *

Allen sighed, turning over on his insignificant sleeping area once again. He was generally used to sprawling out all over his queen-sized bed that he had all to himself, so having to curl up on a cheap-hotel couch with a pedo in the room was a rather big change.

He stared at the ceiling.

Then, not finding the ceiling interesting, he turned over on his side, and ended up facing Tyki.

"I see you're still awake," the older man purred.

"Have you been watching me this whole time?"

"No."

Allen found that hard to believe.

"That's creepy."

"I said 'no'…"

"But you were lying."

"Eh," Tyki said, shrugging, "details shmetails."

It was quiet for a moment.

"So, since you're not sleeping and all," Tyki started, sounding hopeful.

"No."

"Aw. Why not?"

"I'm not in the mood."

"What, that it?"

"Maybe."

Tyki raised an eyebrow, but Allen just scoffed at him.

"Is that all you want from me, hm?" the boy asked, frowning.

"No, or else I would have taken you to a secluded area when you were still tied up and knocked out."

"And what, raped me?"

"Yep."

Allen blinked, his stoic expression faltering.

"It's really scary how calmly you can say that, you know."

"Well, it's the truth," Tyki said. "If it were me, I would be comforted by the fact that the opportunity had arisen and wasn't taken."

"…Surprisingly enough, I'm generally not comforted when people talk about 'rape'."

"Huh. Oh, well."

Allen blinked. Twice. Then he shook his head and turned over onto his back.

"That draft bugging you?" Tyki asked, off-handedly, it seemed.

"A little," Allen admitted.

"There's plenty of room over here."

Allen turned and glared at him.

"What? There is," Tyki said, shrugging.

"No."

"I'll keep to my side of the bed…"

Allen sighed. That bed _did_ seem quite inviting…

"Promise?" he asked.

Tyki grinned. "You have my word."

Allen got up, doubting that the man's _word_ was worth much, and then crawled into the bed, keeping as far away from Tyki as he could. He was practically hanging off the side, actually.

"Goodnight, Allen."

"Goodnight, pedophile."

Tyki winced. _Ouch_.

---

Allen half-woke in the middle of the night, his eyes still closed. He was still half-dreaming, but was aware enough to notice that he was cold. He tried to pull a blanket over him to protect him from the harsh Floridian air conditioning, only to find that he was already _under _a blanket.

So he hugged the pillow under his head, and tried to let his fatigue pull him back into sleep again.

Allen shivered. Then he turned around, and his conscious side was dully surprised by the fact that one of his hands ran into something. He was also quite delighted to find that this something seemed to emanate heat.

_Waaaaaaarm,_ his half-awake mind droned, and he wrapped one of his arms around the heat source, cuddling the rest of him up against it.

Allen quickly fell _all_ the way asleep, and Tyki's dream took a turn for the better.

---

Tyki generally wasn't associated with the phrase "early riser". In fact, he was infinitely more associated with his snooze button, which he probably pressed an upwards of 18 times per week.

Although on this particular morning, he awoke around 10. Which was actually quite a few hours earlier than he usually woke on days off, so you've got to give him credit.

_Although_…his morning wasn't exactly unpleasant, and he probably would have woken up earlier, had Allen _wanted_ him awake. For Allen's technique was a rather nice one.

Tyki first awoke to his shoulder being shaken slightly, and Allen constantly calling, "Tykiiii…Tyyykiiii, wake ahhhhhhp."

But by Tyki's reasoning, it was much too early to get up, and besides, the longer he stayed in bed, the longer he would be in bed with _Allen_. Or, that's what he told himself. In reality he was just tired and his conscious was looking for excuses to continue being _unconscious_.

So, he just kept his eyes closed and pretended to be asleep. Allen would not stand for this, and quickly maneuvered himself up and over the "sleeping" Tyki, landing on his other side, which happened to be the way the man was facing. And there wasn't exactly much room on that side of the bed.

"Tyki," Allen tried again. No reaction. So, Allen slid his hand around Tyki's neck and planted a kiss square on his mouth.

Needless to say, Tyki was wide awake after that.

"Well, good morning," Tyki said after Allen had placed his head back on a pillow.

Allen smiled briefly, and then simply said, "I'm hungry."

"Oooooh." New mental note: _Allen gives out kisses for food_. "So, how do you feel about buffets?"

"I love buffets."

"What a coincidence, so do I…Now, to find one…"

"We could look out the window."

"Eh, yeah. Good point."

---

Tyki took at least a little bit of pity on the restaurant and paid for three people. Although, this really didn't help much considering Allen ate half of the food they had out, and he probably would have eaten more if the buffet staff hadn't realized and kindly asked them to leave _now_.

"Aw, how rude," Allen said as they were walking out of the restaurant.

"Well, in all honesty, if it were _me_, I probably would have done the same thing…"

"Hmmm…yeah, good point. But still."

Allen looked around. Then he looked back at Tyki. Tyki, in turn, felt somewhat troubled by this.

"Er, yes?" he said, looking down at Allen.

"How much money do you have left?"

"I…I don't feel very inclined to answer that…"

"Enough to buy me a smoothie?" Allen asked, sliding his hand into Tyki's.

"Uhm, well, m—"

"'Yes'? Oh, you're so nice I just _might_ thank you when we get back to the hotel…"

Tyki sighed.

"Alright, fine…"

Allen grinned.

---

So, one smoothie (for the both of them) and plenty of awkward looks later, the pair found themselves back in their hotel room.

"Ah, looks like housekeeping came through," Allen absentmindedly said, looking around the room.

"Did they?"

Allen pointed to the bed, which was perfectly made.

"Oh. Huh. I guess we'll just have to mess it up again."

Allen had half a mind to hit Tyki in his gut.

So he did.

"Hey, what was _that_ for?" Tyki complained, wincing.

"For being a pervert."

Tyki sighed.

Then he remembered something.

"Didn't you say you were going to 'thank' me for that smoothie, boy?"

"I said _maybe_," Allen stated, frowning.

"Oh, come on...don't be shy."

"I'm not being shy, _you're_ just being a _perv_."

"So what?"

Allen rolled his eyes, and sighed.

"Alright, I'll make you a deal."

Tyki raised an eyebrow. "And that would be...?"

"I'll play you in a game of cards. If you win, you'll get your thanks. If I win, you don't. Deal?"

Tyki raised an eyebrow. "That's it?"

"That's it."

"Alright. Deal."

---

Tyki shivered, rubbing one of his bare arms. "Can't we at least turn up the heat?"

Allen smirked, shuffling the deck. "Nope."

"Oh come on, that's just cruel."

"It's your fault for turning this into strip poker."

Tyki frowned. "Yeah...but...you're supposed to be loosing more!"

Allen shrugged, and dealt out a hand.

He was, in fact, being someone fair, and had lost a couple of hands. But while Allen still had his shirt, gloves, pants, and socks on, Tyki was down to his pants and whatever was under them. He wasn't doing too well.

Allen frowned at his cards.

Tyki raised an eyebrow.

"How's your hand, hm?"

Allen sighed, and put his cards down. Tyki smirked.

"Well, it's not like you're going to be winning. You've only got so much left to lose," he said, slipping his socks off.

Tyki shrugged. "Well, two more losses for you, and I won't really care."

---

"Oh, well..." Tyki grumbled, fumbling with his pants. Then he paused.

Allen blinked at him. "Something the matter?"

"No, I just remembered something."

Tyki reached up and pulled out his hair tie.

"Okay, next hand."

Allen frowned. "That doesn't seem fair."

"I was wearing it, wasn't I?"

"Well...alright, fine."

---

Tyki sighed. "How are you so good at this game?"

"Practice, practice."

"Right, whatever..."

Tyki stood up and dropped his pants, kicking them into his pile.

"Thank you," Allen said, pushing the deck over to Tyki.

Tyki sniffled. "If I catch a cold, it's your fault."

"Alright. But you won't be able to touch me. You know how contagious that is."

Tyki frowned. "Why are you so mean?"

"Because you're an easy target."

"Oh Cupid, you traitor..."

---

Allen stared at his cards.

"Something wrong, dear?"

"Uh...I don't suppose you'd let me take just _one_ of my gloves off."

"Well, that doesn't seem quite fair."

"But...eh..."

Tyki blinked. "It's just your hands, right?"

Allen frowned, fidgeting with his left hand. "Well, yeah, but..."

Tyki sat there in silence.

Allen sighed.

And then he stood up, and removed his pants.

Tyki was quite a bit confused. "That's a bit out of order..."

Allen frowned at the floor.

Tyki scooted over to him. "Hey, listen, if there's something wrong with your hand or something, that's fine with me. I promise not to be freaked out or anything, honest."

Allen continued staring at the floor.

Tyki sighed. "Well, you're obviously upset about _something_, so I guess there's no fun in playing anymore."

Allen glanced up at him. "Who won, then?"

"Well, _you_ did, of course."

"But..."

"If you feel it should be otherwise, you can always feel free to reward me anyways."

Allen pouted. "As if..." he mumbled, and then got up to climb into the bed. Tyki slipped on his shirt, and then followed him.

"Must you?" Allen inquired into the pillow.

"Of course," Tyki answered, grinning. "Who _else_ is going to warm up the bed for you?"

Allen sighed. "Whatever..."

Tyki stared at the back of Allen's head for a moment.

Then he scooted a little closer to him. "Do I get a goodnight kiss?"

Allen turned to look at him.

"Pretty please?"

Allen thought for a moment. Then he propped himself up on his elbow, and gave Tyki a kiss on the cheek.

"Goodnight," Allen mumbled, and then turned back over to sleep.

Tyki grinned. "Nighty night."

* * *

Short chapter is also kind of short. orz

Oh, well.


End file.
